Haruhiism. The Religion of Haruhi Suzumiya.

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Left4Gumball2 8 811 points

Left4Gumball2

8 811 points

A religion simply following the most ultimate goddess of the world, Haruhi Suzumiya.

What is Haruhiism?

Haruhiism is a religion based around a high school student living in Japan named Haruhi Suzumiya. It is the belief that she possesses the power to re-establish the universe on a whim. Haruhi's attitude is directly linked to the status of the world. If she is upset or in a state of boredom, it's likely she will manufacture a prototype world, also known as a "Closed-Space". Her power has attracted the attention of alternate life-forms and super-humans who are dedicated to studying her actions and preventing her power from altering the world negatively. Haruhi's god-like powers go unnoticed by her own conscious and her followers prefer to keep it that way for the fear that her knowledge of these abilities might lead her to irrational thought. Haruhiists are the external followers of Haruhi who's sole goal is to entertain the goddess and prevent her mood from swaying to the dark end. Haruhiism, to some, is like a game of survival, and most feel honored by this. Even though there is some disagreement between whether Haruhi is the one true god or not, there is not one bit of doubt among all sects of Haruhiism that Haruhi becoming bored is a very bad idea.

Haruhi Day

Haruhi Day is a celebratory holiday originally created in 2011 by the Facebook fan community of Haruhiism. It is celebrated annually on July 7th. Haruhi Day encompasses a couplet of holidays: Ponytail day, a day to wear a ponytail for Kyon's sake and the Japanese Tanabata Star festival. Tanabata has significance in the Haruhi saga as being the day 3 years prior to entering high school that Haruhi re-created the world and granted life to mysterious life forms -- Aliens, Time-Travelers, ESPers, etc. -- by writing an alien language inscription on a sports field. Kyon was inadvertently a part of this event too. Some might argue that it is the day Haruhi was granted her god powers.

Traditions of Haruhi Day can be, but are not limited to...

- Praying to the Goddess Haruhi-sama

- Buying Haruhi media (i.e. - novels, manga, anime, or merchandise like figurines)

- Enjoying any form of Haruhi media available to you.

- Spreading the word of Haruhiism

- Dancing the Hare Hare Yukai

- Wearing a ponytail

- Cosplaying as Haruhi or one of her prophets

It's mostly up to you how you'd like to celebrate the holy day of Haruhi. Just please...keep it appropriate!

Haruhistic 10 Commandments

These commandments are found in the holy texts written by the hollowed prophet of Haruhi, Nagaru Tanigawa.

Thou shalt entertain your god.

Thou shalt not be bored.

Thou shalt keep holy the Sabbath (the day they get new episodes).

Thou shalt enjoy costume-raping.

Thou shalt love chesticles

Thou shalt have no other god other than her.

Thou shalt obey Haruhi and all she demands.

Thou shalt be Haruhi's slave.

Thou shalt not tell the goddess she is god.

The 5 Pillars of Haruhiism

Declaration of Faith-Constantly declaring the phrase "There is no god but Haruhi and Nagaru Tanigawa is Her prophet." They must repeat the phrase constantly to anyone within an earshot in order to somehow convert those people into the religion. It is a great way of pushing your religion on an infidel.

Dancing and Prayer-Believers of this religion do this dance at least 5 times a day as a prayer to Haruhi. Both the ending credits version and the full dance version were declared OK by the Vatican. It should be noted that the character, or characters, the dancer chooses to portray say much about that person's individual faith. Pronouncing the name of the Dance is taboo for Haruhiists, but it is called "Hare Hare Yukai" for your utmost convenience.

Almsgiving-The giving of Haruhi Suzumiya- related objects to those who are too poor to afford them. For example, uploading pirated videos of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya on YouTube.

Fasting-Fasting on days of new episodes and not watching any other anime. Which is very hard for all Haruhiists, and some may even die from it. In 500 A.D few remains of dead Haruhiists were found not watching anime and new episodes.

Pilgrimage-Going to the closest anime, scifi, etc. convention and cosplay as a character from the series or going to North High School in Japan and visit the SOS Brigade meeting room which is the holiest site in the religion. If a Haruhiest goes in cosplay, they will most likely be raped. And they most likely will enjoy it.

The Real S.O.S. Brigade

Recently an armed group dedicated to waging a holy war in the name of Haruhi has emerged on a thread of a popular anime site animecrazy.net in their European club chat thread Its name is the real S.O.S. brigade aka. the Haruhi army. Soon after its emergance it was recognized by all major world powers and intelligence agency as the No.1 threat to the current stability of the world.

And that is Haruhiism! :D

JediPrime 507 points

JediPrime

507 points

I wonder if all will be paying homage to the almighty at Cons this year by playing the Disappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya. Now that it is licensed out of Japan, I expect to partake in its glory at every Con I attend.

Shorigun 4 897 points

Shorigun

4 897 points

I would love to see a Con play Disappearance of Haruhi. We should do a live stream of the Disappearance of Haruhi to pay homage for our great leader and god.

Merry Nightmare 10 993 points Moderator

Merry Nightmare

10 993 points

Moderator

JediPrime said: I wonder if all will be paying homage to the almighty at Cons this year by playing the Disappearance of Har...

I has it :3

JediPrime 507 points

JediPrime

507 points

I was at a con yesterday and they were showing the English Dub.

Honestly, someone fell asleep!...needless to say one of Haruhi's disciples quickly bitch-slapped him in the back of the neck and it never happened again.

Shorigun 4 897 points

Shorigun

4 897 points

Well the English dubs are not as good as the japanese subs.

I prefer reading subtitles over bad voice acting.

RichardKyon 29 points

RichardKyon

29 points

So was bored and was thinking, with the gender swap that is all over the place. It got me thinking if Haruhi was a guy and Kyon a girl and they still acted the same would the show be frowned apon because Haruhi guy would be dragging Kyon girl around by her hair I mean i love Haruhi but just something i was thinking about. XD I get bored at work because it sucks.

JediPrime 507 points

JediPrime

507 points

RichardKyon said: So was bored and was thinking, with the gender swap that is all over the place. It got me thinking if Haruh...

I don't think it would be too crazy...I mean when you have anime where 20 + year old men are trying to entice little pre-teens.

But, I wouldn't love it like our Brigade Leader...

JediPrime 507 points

JediPrime

507 points

Mesquite said: I wish I could go to conventions and stuff...

You will be able to - are there any in your area?

Mesquite 93 points

Mesquite

93 points

JediPrime said: You will be able to - are there any in your area?

Technically yes, but work/school keeps me from traveling.

JediPrime 507 points

JediPrime

507 points

Little Buster (Holy Crap It's Been Years) said: I...I...I need to show this to my Comparative Religions teacher. Haruhi bless you, OP. -bows and flashes my...

I would make a good extra credit project :)

Left4Gumball2 8 811 points

Left4Gumball2

8 811 points

Little Buster (Holy Crap It's Been Years) said: I...I...I need to show this to my Comparative Religions teacher. Haruhi bless you, OP. -bows and flashes my...

No. Bless YOU for giving me that idea!! :DD

I must say though, it's hard to find fellow Haruhiists that live around my area. >.< I've gotten some people to start watching, but no one has brought themselves as far enough to become a Haruhiist. T_T

Mesquite 93 points

Mesquite

93 points

Perhaps there should be localised places of worship: other religions have churches, temples, mosques, shrines, ect...

Shorigun 4 897 points

Shorigun

4 897 points

Our place of worship would be a classroom filled with Haruhi Merchandise and Melancholy of Haruhi mangas. There will also be a 6 foot statue of Haruhi in all of her glory.

KaosTHedgehog 291 points

KaosTHedgehog

291 points

Shorigun said: Our place of worship would be a classroom filled with Haruhi Merchandise and Melancholy of Haruhi mangas. T...

Yes along with all the Light Novels and the S.O.S Brigade sign on the walls

Perisk 59 points

Perisk

59 points

Mesquite said: Picture to go with the theme. http://media.nyusu.fm/board/attachment/fdb66e3a73b4d0812e88b200ecb49819.jpg

OH MY HARUHI!!! I LOVE THIS!!

Krafty 2 points

Krafty

2 points

I love most of this, but, "If a Haruhiest goes in cosplay, they will most likely be raped. And they most likely will enjoy it."

No one enjoys rape, it is a violent act.

Pope haruhii

Pope haruhii

To all haters of haruhi, The power of haruhii compels you

jiuer7845 38 points

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